Flying Bacon
by The Readers Muse
Summary: "Pigs were flying. Somewhere. They had to be. – And probably currently being chased by roving hordes of salivating walkers from below to boot. It was the only way he could think of to explain his current reality."
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I don't own AMC's The Walking Dead or any of its characters. Wishful thinking aside.

**Authors**** Note**** #1:** This is my fill response to a prompt posted on LJ at the TWD_Kink Meme community_:__"__Daryl__ – __Side__ affects:__ Daryl__ has__ a__ weird __reaction __to__ pain killers/antibiotics.__ Maybe __he's__ giggly,__ cuddly?__ Go __wild__ nonnie.__" _*****Rated for: adult language, adult situations, light slash, and adorableness. *****Spoilers from 2x05 to 2x07.

**Authors Note ****#2:** Please read and review. I am excited to see what you all think. I am open to comments, advice, and constructive criticism.

**Flying Bacon**

Pigs were flying. _Somewhere._ They had to be. – And probably currently being chased by roving hordes of salivating walkers from below to boot. It was the only way he could think of to explain his current reality. All other explanations simply paled in comparison. They couldn't even get _close._

_Flying freakin' bacon... – It had to be. Nothing else made sense otherwise._

Because really, how did one simply explain away the fact that Daryl _freakin__' _Dixon had just come up behind him. All bare chested swagger, and jeans that hung too low across the span of his lean, muscle hewn hips._ - _A sloppy, criminally easy smile sliding across his _too _open features. As lazy, doped up blue eyes crinkled upwards just around the same time as calloused palms wrapped around him from behind. Curving around the arch of his narrow hips like they just _belonged_ there?

– In short, you couldn't. You _just_ couldn't.

"What did he give him?" He mouthed. Trying and utterly failing not look as desperate he felt as Daryl's lips dragged across the back of his head. Flicking off his hat with a surprisingly coordinated snap of his wrist as blunt fingers dug deep into the trailing hairs at the base of his skull. Sending aroused shivers down the length of his spine as the man's fingers pressed into the tense muscles of his shoulders. Making quiet, content little noises in the back of his throat before the man pressed his lips back into his hair again.

_Christ._ They were all doomed. - _Fucking __doomed_….

Andrea just gave him a helpless little look that bordered somewhere between guilt and growing amusement as she fished the bottle Hershel had handed over close to an hour ago, out from the depths of her purse. Frantically twirling the label around in her hands, lips catching between her teeth as she sped read through the list of complex ingredients. At the same as he tried to remember _exactly_ what the older man had said when he'd come down to update the group on Daryl's recovery.

It had been something about making sure the man slept through the night undisturbed, and remembering to make sure he took a second dose once he woke up. - With the older man muttering on under his breath about surly patients, wayward horses, and the problems of so called 'troubled youth' these days as he'd ambled towards the barn. The keys to the chicken coop barely visible in his tightly clenched fist.

_Weird. Didn't they always feed the chickens in the morning?_

Hershel of course, was predictably was no where to be seen. - He smelled a rat there. Was this pay back for Daryl putting up a fuss as the older man had stitched him up? Or an unhanded form insurance to make sure the man didn't end up doing something stupid. Like heading off to search for Sophia and ripping his side open all over again in the process.

_Or maybe those pain killers were just stronger then Hershel had originally thought… _

Andrea just shook the bottle at him helplessly. Affirming his fears that it was _same_ bottle Daryl had tossed over from Merle's stash a few days earlier. The one, if he remembered correctly, that the man had coined as being: _"__some__ kick __ass__ painkillers.__"_ - …_Shit. _- But even then he didn't quite miss the fact that while the blond woman still looked like guilt personified. He realized that even as he watched, her frown lines were noticeably lessening, tinged with growing amusement as her eyes followed Daryl's movements. Her grin only widening as Daryl leaned forward.

And before he knew it the man and his wandering hands were trailing back along his shoulders, using them as a platform as the hunter rested his head atop his bent forearm. Using his entire body like a crutch as the man rubbed his face into the crook of his neck, warm breaths gusting across his ear as Daryl shifted his hips across the curve of his spine. The movement surprisingly subtle and almost unnoticeable if you weren't looking for it, as the injured man made to speak.

"…Heeeeeyy…_G-Gl-eeeeennnn_…."

_Well fuck._

It was the way the man said it that _really_ did it, drawling out of syllables of his name until they became something absolutely _obscene._ All bedroom tones and that hot, _fuck-me__-sideways_ stare. Something that in itself melded strangely with the man's sleep mussed hair, with the odd tuft sticking up in at least _five_ completely _impossible_ angles. All skewed to the left side by the gauze wrapped bandage that stood out starkly around the man's dark haired head.

Coming from anyone else, the image would have been absolutely adorable. - And if he was being completely honest with himself, despite the threat of their _imminent __doom_ that was _clearly_ building just beyond the horizon, he pretty much still did. Though he figured he was probably _slightly_ biased on the subject anyway. - For god sakes, he'd somehow still managed to find the man ridiculously attractive as he'd staggered out of the woods just a few hours earlier.. A hot, injured mess of blood, muck, and god only knows what else, with that necklace of walker ears bouncing around his neck like the world's _nastiest_ fashion accessory.

_He was going to the special hell for even thinking about it…He just knew it._

He'd never seen Daryl like this. Not even in bed. There had been a few times where the man had opened up, having smiled and even laughed a bit. They were memories, _moments_ that he'd hoarded jealously, cherishing them, as few and far between as they were, as evidence of their growing progress. Of slowly working through each others issues and hang ups together. - But those moments were_ nothing_ compared to this. Where the man was all honeyed slowness and softening edges. Breathing into his neck with unconsciously familiarity, all warms gusts of air and heavy lids.

_Jesus._

Honestly, if the others hadn't been standing around watching, and if he wasn't almost ninety five percent sure that it was _still_ illegal in over half the southern states, he would have been tempted to jump the man right then and there. - Because really. - _This__…__this_ was almost too much. For god sakes the man was practically _climbing_ his way up the length of him!

…But getting back to that whole imminent doom thing? - Yeah, let's address that for a moment shall we? - Because really. Holy fucking _shit_ on a_ stick_….

Because Daryl slumming around being adorable, body all lax, dopey, and giving him those bold, bedroom eyes stares were all fine and good. _– __Very __fine__ and__ good __actually__… __-_ All except for one tiny problem… The fact that they had an _audience_, a very large and unexpectedly _attentive_ audience at that.

_All they needed was Hershel's missing horse to show up and it'd be freaking family reunion._

He supposed the real crux of the matter was that they'd been trying to keep their whole relationship on the down low. Personally he wouldn't have minded much if they others knew, figuring that all the secrecy wasn't worth the hassle. Especially when the world had effectively ended and there was far more pressing shit for them to worry about then burgeoning sexual crisis's and other people's opinions on the matter. But he'd respected Daryl's desire not to call attention to it. With the older man muttering something about it being none of the others business or whatever.

And true to form he'd been stressing out about keeping the secret for weeks now. Ever since that night at the CDC when he'd finally summed up the nerve to knock on the man's door at close to four in the morning. Only half way sober and blushing with embarrassment as he nearly bowled the man over the moment the older man had yanked opened the door. Kissing him for all he was worth, nearly desperate to get his hands on the man before he chickened out completely. - Lucky for him the man had felt the exact same way. – But he supposed that story was neither here nor there. The point was that he found it almost deliciously ironic how it was actually Daryl _himself_ that had unintentionally outed them both.

_Well. …Um…Surprise?_

It was all going much better then expected if he was being honest. Utter embarrassment and complete lack of dignity aside of course. Because Lori just looked mostly distracted, eyes distant as she ran a hand down Rick's forearm. Smile tugging on the corners of her lips as Rick ducked his head, catching her gaze as a rare smile spread across his face, wrapping his arms around her shoulders like they were enjoying some sort of private joke.

– _Wait_. Had they known? The thought alone was almost too much to even consider. Daryl was going to have _kittens_ just _thinking_ about it.

Dale and T-Dog looked both bemused and confused in turn. But even then they were expressions that quickly morphed into small smiles, as if the both of them were simply enjoying the hilarity of the moment. – _The__ sheer__ goodness__ of__ it._ A moment where there was nothing more pressing to worry about then how they were all going to be able keep a straight face around Daryl the next day.

Carol, for her part, just looked remarkably self satisfied. With the sad downturn of her kind face seemingly banished, if only for the moment, watching the both of them with such open fondness that he couldn't find it in him regret even a single moment of the whole unintentional reveal. And call him crazy, but he was almost _certain_ that Daryl would have grudgingly agreed with him. The man was all but _putty_ when it came to Carol these days.

But naturally, since no party is complete without that drunk, overly rowdy asshole that breaks your mother's favorite lamp and ends up puking in someone's shoe. That was the moment where Shane decided to step up and make his…_feelings_ known.

"Never seen painkillers do _that_ before." Shane spat, tone just shy of scathing as his stance shifted. Moving up from his position just behind the others as he pointed his feet towards the porch steps, hands clenching into sudden fists as the sound of angry boot soles echoed across the surface the first step.

_..Balls._

At first he was too busy attempting to save both their tattered dignities to notice the caliber of the man's words, distracted by yet _another_ near miss as he caught Daryl's hands before they made another rather uncoordinated break for freedom down the length of his sides. Fingers curling under the hem of his shirt as the overly friendly appendages ventured south, worming their way dangerously close to his zipper before he panicked and lightly smacked the man's hands away.

- Daryl however was having none of it. His blunt fingers trickling back down the lengths of his sides as fast as he could pry any given digit free. Apparently oblivious to the fact that Andrea was nearly doubled over in front of them, fighting off silent giggles as Carol patted her back, a blindingly sweet smile gracing her features as she clearly basked in the moment herself.

_Holy Jesus.. - Daryl was going to kill the world when those pills wore off._

But by the time the nature of officer's words permeated in his distracted brain, he was already turning away, effectively putting the close minded douche in his metaphorical, rear view mirror as he directed Daryl back towards the screen door. Working to get the injured man back into the safety of Hershel's guest bedroom, when Rick added his voice to the fray.

"Maybe you'd best get him inside Glenn. Back to _bed_." Rick suggested pointedly, lips apparently losing their battle with keeping a straight face as he smiled at them both in the muted evening light. With the older man having obviously come to his own damn conclusions about what he'd seen. - If he hadn't known already.

…_Crap.__ Crap.__ Crap__…__._

It was only when he heard Shane clearing the last step and coming up behind them that he tensed, arm clenching just a little bit tighter around Daryl's waist as he heard Shane's harsh breaths echoing out into the sudden silence. - The others shifted audibly in the background. Finally cluing in to Shane and his behavior as the quick steps of Rick's boot soles clipped up the porch steps in less time then it took to blink. Standing warily beside his friend as a hard look descended over the man's usually amicable features. Fixing Shane with a cool stare as he let a hand fall over the taller man's shoulder, message clear.

But Daryl only turned in his grip, head looping on a uneven swivel as he threw the others a jaunty, smug little smile and slurred out a drawling: "G'night 'ya'll…" - Like heading back inside had been _his_ idea all along.

- Apparently oblivious to Shane's menacing posture only a mere meter or so away as the others gave him a series of amused little waves in response. With all of them, save for Shane, sporting the widest, most _genuine_ smiles he'd seen on _any_ of them since the CDC.

…He didn't know whether to laugh or pound his head against the god damned wall on sheer principal.

_Daryl was going to be the death of him. He swore to god._

**A/N:**. Please let me know what you think? And if you are interested in a second chapter. Reviews and constructive critiquing are love!

"_What is straight? A line can be straight, or a street, but the human heart, oh, no, it's curved like a road through mountains." ~Tennessee Williams. (A Streetcar Named Desire, 1947)._


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** I don't own AMC's The Walking Dead or any of its characters. Wishful thinking aside.

**Authors**** Note**** #1:** This is my fill response to a prompt posted on LJ at the TWD_Kink Meme community_:__"__Daryl__ – __Side__ affects:__ Daryl__ has__ a __weird __reaction__ to__ painkillers/antibiotics.__ Maybe__ he's__ giggly,__ cuddly?__ Go__ wild__ nonnie.__" _*****Rated for: adult language, adult situations, light slash, and adorableness. *****Spoilers from 2x05 to 2x07.

**Authors ****Note**** #2:** Please read and review. I am excited to see what you all think. I am open to comments, advice, and constructive criticism.

**Flying Bacon**

_**Chapter 2**_

By the time he had Daryl through the screen door he could already hear the others waylaying the older man. The partially muffled conversation rapidly growing into a chorus of raised voices that echoed all down the hall as the others clearly gave Shane a piece of their minds. - But it wasn't until he began steering the man towards the staircase that he breathed out a heady sigh of relief. Mind already briskly processing through what had happened, categorizing the moment down to the make of up of the closest second before stuffing it away for future thought and study. Finding himself completely unable to stop a small smile from filtering across his lips as he heard Carol join the fray from outside.

_You go girl._

"Come on, we need to get you back to bed." He said, looping one of the man's arms over his shoulder as he struggled to keep Daryl upright. Mindful of the man's bandages as he curled himself into the man's uninjured side. Huffing indignantly as the man did absolutely nothing to help either one of them. - Seemingly content for the moment to simply grin at the sitting room wallpaper with something that looked suspiciously similar extreme fondness. Nearly sending the both of them crashing to the floor as the older man reached out to brush his fingers across the surface of the rather unremarkable swath of wall.

_Yep. – Still stoned out of his freakin' gourd alright._

Daryl just gave him an appreciative, if not rather loopy once over as he finally responded to his words. Eyes clearly lingering as the man paused somewhat obviously at the crotch of his jeans. - _And__ the __subtlety__ award__ of __the__ year__ goes__ to__ …_

"Only if 'ya join me." The man said suggestively. Wavering a bit as he leaned forward, pinning him unexpectedly against the railing as Daryl licked his way into his mouth without even so much as a fair warning. _-_ And god help him, even as drugged up and injured as the man was, he couldn't _not_ respond. Not to _that__… _Not to _Daryl_….

Because a small, rather guilty little part of him couldn't quite deny that for all his blushes and embarrassment he actually _liked_ the man this way. All easy, warm, and pliable under his hands… -_ Relaxed_. All the things the man was in truth, even if it was a part of himself that the man kept inside. _Safe_. - Just like life had taught him too.

The man's gauze wrapped head scraped against his neck for a few long seconds as sharp teeth nipped along the edge of his collarbone. Apparently supremely unconcerned with the fact that they were all but making out both in plain view of the closed screen door, and in the middle of Hershel's god damned house to boot.

But by the time he pulled himself together, frantically attempting to unwrap their tangled limbs and stop _Daryl's-his-both_ of their hips from grinding together, Daryl had already abandoned his mouth in favor of more _stationary_ targets. Namely, currently occupying himself with sucking a series of sloppy kisses along the length of his shoulder blades before he finally found it in himself to gently push the man away.

Breathing hard, he watched as Daryl eased back, rocking unconcernedly on the balls of his feet as the man licked his lips lavishly. - Shamelessly shoving an errant finger into his mouth with an _indecent_ sucking noise (that absolutely _had_ to be deliberate by the way) as the man set to work on ridding himself of an angry looking hang nail. – One of these days he was really going to have to talk to the man about his _oral_ fixation. He was always sticking _something _in there.

Wait…Did that come out wrong?

He shook his head incredulously, willing away the rather intriguing images that were currently all but dancing the conga in the back of his brain. Because really, the last thing he needed right now was to run into Hershel with his recently escaped patient in tow. And have the older man see one of them sporting one hell of a boner that just _couldn__'__t_ be blamed on the painkillers.

Besides, trying to navigate the stairs with a fully grown man all but plastered across his shoulders was hard enough without throwing a raging erection into the mix. – Something relating to light headedness and the rapid redirection of blood flow and junk? God why hadn't he been studying something _useful_ in university? Like Human Biology or Basic Apocalypse Survival Skills 101?

…_Anyway._

"Whatever_ Lothario_. If it will make you shut up." He finally muttered back. Tone teasing, but practically wheezing from his lungs under their combined weight as he pushed them both forward another few steps. - Just fifteen more to go. _...Balls._

_The raunchy asshole was heavier then he looked._

But Daryl just chuffed at him happily, snuffling hotly into that venerable spot at the base of his spine as he nipped at him pointedly. Leaning further into him then was necessarily appropriate as they continued their slow, lingering trek up the stairs. Blunt fingers getting tangled up in his hair more then once as the man mashed an overly familiar hand across his scalp, flattening and running his hands through it all at the same time.

_..First__ the__ wallpaper__ and__ now__ his __hair?_ He was almost afraid to even _think_ about what the man would go after next…_Because__ knowing__ Daryl_…

When they finally made it all the way up the stairs, having managed to get his ass groped six ways to Sunday in the process, he only had it in him to sigh with relief. Hardly even noticing when Maggie stuck her head out the bedroom door as he all but dragged Daryl down the hall. - Wrinkling that cute, button nose at them, before shutting her door in an ill tempered huff. Something that in itself, only made him roll his eyes as they passed. Chalking it down as just the latest evidence as to why he swore he would _never_ understand girls. …_Ever._

Daryl just grinned victoriously the whole way, apparently content with having finally managed to get a hand down the back of his jeans somewhere in between the tenth and thirteenth step. Palming an ass cheek with a surprising amount of single minded coordination as he all but dragged Daryl into the room and slammed the door.

_Finally._

It was only when the rather inviting looking bed was within his sights that the man seemed to fully realize they had even moved at all, blinking owlishly around the room for a few long beats, before that same dopey smile spread across his chapped lips. - Imploding outwards with all the good old fashioned _gumption_ of a Georgian sunrise on a_ Monday_ morning.

"Th-that's right kid..- Knew ya'd get with the program." Daryl slurred approvingly. A happy purr rumbling up his throat as he pressed the older man towards the bed, sitting him down on the edge as gently as possible before he crouched down and started undoing the man's shoe laces.

_Un-freaking-believable. _

He shook his head, incredulous fondness leaching across his features as he looked up at the man from his position at his feet. Giving the hunter an appreciate eye himself as he took in the lightly muscled span of the man's chest, finding himself unrepentantly lingering as the muscles in the man's arms bunched and released as he leaned backwards. Lounging back on his forearms as the hunter's eyes went heavy lidded and dark, clearly watching his every movement now as the man's throat worked through an exaggerated swallow.

_Christ._

He couldn't help but just take it in; looking up at the man through thick, dark lashes as his fingers tugged at the series of knots and tangles that Daryl had the _gall_ to call shoelaces. - _Damn._ How did the man _do__ that_? - Even drugged up his ears the man somehow seemed to just_ ooze_ sex appeal.

"Mmmm…_Yeah_." Daryl hummed, arm streaking out across the rumpled blankets to rasp across the length of his cheek. Calloused fingers roughing across his skin almost fondly before the man began plucking at his shirt collar. Encouraging him to his feet so that he was now standing over him as the man pulled him in for another lazy kiss. All pushy lips, sloppy mouthed and too sharp teeth grazing across his tongue as the injured man's eyes went heavy.

"You gunna t-take care of me then kid?.." Daryl growled, tone falling into a deep, gravely little purr as the man's eyes roamed down the length of him. Fixing him with that sultry, dark eyed stare that never failed to make both his stomach flip flop on sheer principal, and have him all but _melting_ out of his clothes faster then a virgin on prom night.

He was just wriggling out of his jeans, cock inexplicably rock hard and throbbing as a slightly more perverse corner of his brain started to entertain thoughts of what it would be like to fuck Daryl like this. – Because by now he was all but certain that the man would let him, all easy muscles and accommodating laxness. The man only coaxing him on with that obscene, drawling slur, topping from the bottom just like he always did on the rare occasion he could actually convince Daryl to let him fuck him. - (Because really -_oh-god-yes._) - When he heard it.

…The sound of soft, absolutely dead-to-the-fucking-world snores coming up from the mound of pillows and blanket's he'd pushed the man back into only a mere minute before…

- Because predictably, just because today had proven to be both a giant mind fuck and a cock blocker to boot, the man had gone and fallen _asleep_ before his head had even properly hit the pillow.

…_Son of a bitch!_

**A/N:** This story is now complete. Thank you to all my lovely reviewers from chapter one! I simply adored all your comments! You spoil me! - Please let me know what you think of this concluding chapter? Reviews and constructive critiquing are love!

_"I can resist everything except temptation." - Oscar Wilde._


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